Friday, November 28, 2008

Apparently I'm a Grace...

Your result for Are You a Jackie or a Marilyn? Or Someone Else? Mad Men-era Female Icon Quiz...

You Are a Grace!

mm.grace_.jpg


You are a Grace -- "I need to understand the world."



Graces have a need for knowledge and are introverted, curious, analytical, and insightful.



How to Get Along with Me

  • * Be independent, not clingy

  • * Speak in a straightforward and brief manner

  • * I need time alone to process my feelings and thoughts

  • * Remember that If I seem aloof, distant, or arrogant, it may be that I am feeling uncomfortable

  • * Make me feel welcome, but not too intensely, or I might doubt your sincerity

  • * If I become irritated when I have to repeat things, it may be because it was such an effort to get my thoughts out in the first place

  • * don't come on like a bulldozer

  • * Help me to avoid my pet peeves: big parties, other people's loud music, overdone emotions, and intrusions on my privacy




What I Like About Being a Grace
* standing back and viewing life objectively
* coming to a thorough understanding; perceiving causes and effects
* my sense of integrity: doing what I think is right and not being influenced by social pressure
* not being caught up in material possessions and status
* being calm in a crisis



What's Hard About Being a Grace

  • * being slow to put my knowledge and insights out in the world

  • * feeling bad when I act defensive or like a know-it-all

  • * being pressured to be with people when I don't want to be

  • * watching others with better social skills, but less intelligence or technical skill, do better professionally




Graces as Children Often

  • * spend a lot of time alone reading, making collections, and so on

  • * have a few special friends rather than many

  • * are very bright and curious and do well in school

  • * have independent minds and often question their parents and teachers

  • * watch events from a detached point of view, gathering information

  • * assume a poker face in order not to look afraid

  • * are sensitive; avoid interpersonal conflict

  • * feel intruded upon and controlled and/or ignored and neglected




Graces as Parents

  • * are often kind, perceptive, and devoted

  • * are sometimes authoritarian and demanding

  • * may expect more intellectual achievement than is developmentally appropriate

  • * may be intolerant of their children expressing strong emotions




Take Are You a Jackie or a Marilyn? Or Someone Else? Mad Men-era Female Icon Quiz
at HelloQuizzy

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Just When...

Just when I think I'm all set and ready to move on to a new place, I find some reminder of why leaving will be so incredibly sad and difficult. This time around has, by far, been the most poignant of all.



I'm leaving behind my friends.



And I mean, I'm leaving behind my very good friends. My ladies. The women on whom I've come to rely for so much over the last two years of my life... My support group and in large part, my strength as a woman, mother, and wife. And this post is for them. For Amber, Bobbi, Kelly, Jenny... Even for those I don't "hang out with" on a regular basis like Misty and Sunshine and Fara. It's even for the women whose names I don't know but with whom I chatted for hours at the playground or took walks with or called with phone tree messages. We all have this crazy common bond - be it motherhood or our lives as Navy wives or just as women - and I never in my life knew how valuable that is until I came here, to King's Bay.



I had friends before. I even had a best friend in high school that I called "Sis". But I never really understood how powerful a tool a friendship can be. I've never found my life to be so enriched by my relationships with other women. But those people I mentioned earlier have changed all of that. I love them and I am so incredibly sad to be moving away. I know I won't be far and there are phones and the magic of the Internet, but I will forever miss the opportunity to spend a warm November afternoon at a playground with my friends and our kids, listening to their happy banter and chatting about all the things that make us who we are - laughing because we've all been "there" and we all understand one another and being comfortable with ourselves because we have so many unspoken things in common. And even as we silently acknowledge those similarities, each of us appreciates everyone else's individuality and those different elements are what weave together to make a group stronger. It's truly remarkable.



I don't know what I would have done without Amber. She has been an inspiration and a comic relief. I love her like a sister and I love her son like a nephew. Even her husband isn't bad. She's truly amazing and one of the strongest people I know. You might love borders, Choke Me, but I love you.



Bobbi, you've been my friend through thick and thin and even when we didn't have others to turn to, we had us - chicken spaghetti and Law and Order and taboo talk of pornos. Your company has been a life saver through some of the loneliest times in my life. I am so happy to see how far you've come and to see your little girl grow up into such a joy. I'm so proud of you and your family.



I haven't known you as long, Kelly, and I am truly sorry about that. I'm so glad we've become friends and shared as many laughs as we have. Your outlook on life is so refreshing and so much fun and yet so wise. You're an incredible person, and I only hope that one day I can be half the mom you are. I have lots to learn from you.



I don't even know where to begin to explain how awesome Jenny is. She went to welding school. She is an absolute rock star. She's been through so many patrols and hasn't blown up a boat that I think she's something of a loon. I can count on her for anything - a smile, a favor, a conversation... She's such a beautiful person and so giving and so honest. I have a lot to live up to if I want to be the kind of woman Jenny is. She's always been there for me and I just hope I can return that favor someday.



I could go on and on and on about the awesomeness of my friends. I really could. I could get even sappier and seem even more like a lezzie stalker. But I'll leave it here and say that I am so so so fortunate that I've had the chance to make these relationships and I pray every day that I can keep them.



And, oh, one final point: I have to say, thank you, Katie McGrath, for being such a gigantic bitch that I realized being friends with you was a waste so I could devote that much more time to the real people in my life. Had you not been the horrible person you were, I might have missed out on some of the best memories I've ever had the privilege to be a part of.



Here's to the ladies that make my life good...



Much love,

Melissa

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

26.

If my mom calls at 4:18 in the morning to say "happy birthday", I can personally assure her that I will kick her ass.

And when did I get halfway through my 20's?

Yikes.

On a super cool note, I can totally feel my twins moving. How crazy is that? I'm about 11 weeks now, and those little guys are absolutely making their presence known in the most badass of ways. Hi, little guys, I love you too!

Saturday, November 8, 2008

Clown Car

Well, I just put Jack's Britax car seat in the middle seat of the Prius and tried to stuff an infant seat on either side... Well, I can't tighten any of the 3 to acceptable standards, and both of the infant seats are slanted to one side and both of the front seats have to be scooted up to where Justin won't be able to drive. Totally safe.

So, off we go to look at vans.

Oh my Lord, how did I get here?

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

Big News

I'm sorry, I'm pulling this right off my baby page, but I haven't got the time or energy to write a totally orginal post...

Well, I guess I've been waiting for the right time to put this out there, but now's as good a time as any... Justin, Jack and I are getting ready to welcome more love into our family. A little bit of a surprise, but hey, that's God's way sometimes, right? We've been sitting on the news for the most part because I've felt really, truly horrendously bad with this pregnancy - much more so than with Jack and I wanted to either make it out of the first trimester without getting too excited or at least make it to our first pre-natal checkup, which we've done as of today. Hence, the news.

Twins.



Jack is going to have twin siblings.

No, it doesn't run in either of our families. No, they're likely not identical. No, no fertility treatments. 1 in 80ish chance.

We were shocked. We were joking with the tech who did the ultrasound before we started about how we wanted her to make sure she didn't find more than one in there... well, Dr. Mixson made sure Justin and I were looking at the screen at the same time when he turned it around. I looked at it and said, "aaaw, how cute, there's the little heart bea... or is that it? Wait, what's that other thi... No. No way. You have to be joking." The doctor just laughed (he's really excited about this) and said, "No, no joke. Those are both your babies and they look wonderful." I was floored. Justin laughed. (He's allowed to be way more excited than me considering my body is about to be DESTROYED...)

So the medical stuff, first. They're officially due on June 12th, 2009, but they never let twins go that far, so I'll be delivering no later than late May if my kiddos hang in there that long. Really, Dr. Mixson said I'm fine and in great shape and perfectly healthy so I shouldn't expect any real problems, especially this early on. But many, many multiples come early, so that's our main concern. Right now they're both big and strong - they're the same size and developing right on track together with good, healthy heartbeats, and wee little arms, legs, hands and feet that are already waving about and anxious to beat the crap out of my innards. (And each other, but there's nothing I can do about that...)

Yes, I do intend to nurse them both. Yes, I do plan to deliver them both vaginally and naturally. The only obstacle to delivery will be if the first kiddo is breech, in which case I'm stuck with a C-section. If he (and we're calling them "he" until further notice) isn't breech, I can deliver him and then we can either flip his brother or I can squeeze him out breech. I'm not in the least worried about labor and delivery. I'm actually looking forward to getting on with this whole adventure and putting the waiting and the wondering behind us.

Now, for our family, this is a HUGE change. We were adjusting to the reality of having 2 kids. This makes a big, big, almost incomprehensible, difference. Financially it will probably be more of an undertaking that I could have imagined because we can't bank on using Jack's old car seat and getting by with hand-me-downs this time... We're going to need another car seat, at least one more crib, some kind of stroller contraption for either 2 or 3 kids, massive quantities of diapers... the list goes on. It's daunting right now. And there is absolutely no legal or sane way that 3 car seats will fit in either our beloved Toyota Prius or our dear Honda Civic. Don't ask me what we're going to do, but we'll figure it out. I get way less upset about the financial side of things when I look at my Blobs.

Listen, if you have advice or anything, now is the time to cough it up because we're a little overwhelmed!!

I've been a bit sad since the outset of all this about my dwindling time with Jack. He is, without a doubt, my best friend, my little anchor, my angel... I was not prepared to cut my devotion to him in half, let alone in thirds or less. I've got a zillion concerns about how he'll handle being "the outsider" in our 3-some of kids or even if it'll be anything but awesome for the younger two to be a unit so Jack and I will retain our special bond... But I'm excited to see him as an older brother! He's so caring and nurturing and sweet and social that I think he'll settle into the role with the zest and gusto we know and love from Jack.

Thankfully we've made the decision that we're going to move to Virginia as a family at the end of November, regardless of whether or not our house has sold. Although it is going to be a financial strain to handle the two house payments (mortgage in GA and rent in VA), we really need to be together as a family right now. (And hey, may as well get used to paying for two of everything from now on, right!?) We have found a beautiful house up there that I'll talk about later in another post when I have energy, that's thankfully plenty big for our rapidly expanding family.
Well, that's about all the updating I've got energy for right now - I've got lots of fun stuff to talk about here about Jack, but he deserves his own post and I deserve a nap after the morning I've had.

Stay tuned for more on our crazy, crazy family!

Sunday, November 2, 2008

Mature?

So in a testament to my awesome maternal skillZ and my above-average maturity level, I just got into a fight with my 20-month-old son over some combination of water cups and popcorn that ended with me dousing him with not only HIS cup of water, but with MY cup of ice water. In the middle of my living room.

Now, if that's not top-notch parenting, I don't know what is. Maybe I should go lock him in a car or something... oh, wait.

Apparently he's not transitioning well to the whole daylight savings time thing. So that warrants me chucking a glass of water in his face? Stellar, Melis.

The best part is, I made him clean up the mess.

Saturday, November 1, 2008

Bamm-Bamm

Isn't Jack adorable? I'm so proud of him. Bamm-Bamm... we've called him that since he was itty bitty because he was so strong as a wee baby and he had this thing for bopping our noses...
I realized that I will probably be that mom that lets her kids decide what they want to be for Halloween and then goes out and makes the costumes by hand because they're too ridiculous to find in stores. (What? Exactly like my mom? Whose 7-th grade daughter wants to be a dead pilgrim? Yes...) Along those lines, I will probably pull all-nighters on science fair projects, will bake cupcakes from scratch for the entire grade, and will decorate my car (NOT mini-van) for each and every sporting event for each child.
And I love it.

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